The Ordsall Prayer

From closely studying the letters page of the Guardian, I find that some are trying to claim for England's capital city a special connection to the Lord. On October 20 there was this version of the Lord's Prayer:

Our Father who art in Hendon, Harrow be thy name. Thy Kingston come, Thy Wimbledon, In Erith as it is in Heston. Give us this day our daily Brent. And lead us not into Thames Ditton. For thine is the Kingston, the Putney and the Goring. For ever and ever, Crouch End.

And the following day, this incomplete version:

And lead us not into Temple Station. But deliver us from Ealing. For thine is the Kingston, the Purley and the Crawley. For Iver and Iver, Crouch End.

Though claiming no special connections of the kind myself, I don't think it's right that London should have a monopoly on the Lord's Prayer and (should it turn out that He exists) His ear. So I offer this alternative version on behalf of Greater Manchester:

Our Father, which art in Heaton,
Fallowfield be thy Name.
Thy Kingston come.
Thy Withington.
In Irlam as it is in Denton.
Give us this day our Lower Bredbury.
And forgive us our Reddishes,
As we forgive them that Prestwich against us.
And lead us not into Miles Platting;
But deliver us from Cheadle:
For thine is the Swinton, the Crumpsall, and the Gorton,
For Eccles and Eccles. Green End.

OK, so there are weaknesses. Treat it as a working draft.